We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
