I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize