made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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