see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize