My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize