Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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