i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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