So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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