just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
