how hairy? two words: wookie tits
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize