There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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