My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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