im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
