WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
