my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
