I can't watch pbs sober anymore
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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