Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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