the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
