I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Randomize
