I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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