Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
