they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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