I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
