I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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