I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
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