i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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