Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
