we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
