I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
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