I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
