It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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