Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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