Pants 0. Shit 1.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
