Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
