I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
