yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
