Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
