The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
