4 words: hood of his car
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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