Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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