I didn't shave. On purpose
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
