Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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