sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
