i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
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