he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Randomize