Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
