TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I think I just shit out all my problems.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
