The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
