Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
