I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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