Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
